life as it is!

So to be fair and update you all on life - Bryan is working at U of M hospital in Ann Arbor - which is a long commute but he's good about it. and I'm taking CNA classes at the community college in hopes of getting a job in the nursing field. It's interesting to me to learn all that i am. to be honest i won't say it's not tough.. but it's funny the homework seems like common sense to me... - read the chapter - find the answer.. but i attribute that to my teachers at NTBI who always asked us tough questions and we had to go through 4 or 5 different books to find an answer that would satisfy them. good prep for this.. well it's funny because i will sit down and get all my homework done in about 2 hours tops.. and i come into class and see these girls fresh out of high school who sit there and go - i can't find the answer - and when i point it out them that they have to read this part of the chapter - they look at me with blank stares like I'm some magician or something and go- OH!! I hadn't thought of that..
There's one girl - here i go rambling - that is 17... and after being in NTBI she seems so conceited and immature. she doesn't want to be in the class. which on some level annoys me - A. because it's a waste of her time - when she could be doing something else she wanted. and B. because she talks when the teacher talks - so i have to constantly ask her to be quiet or try to hear over her... but on the flip side - i came home last night so ticked from this girl... then this morning - i had a thought - do i really want to be doing that job anymore than her?? the answer - NO probably not - i don't think anyone really enjoys watching people die, wiping their rumps, and trying to make them comfortable when you know that they hate being there. because that's all that a CNA is... a glorified rump-wiper... to quote my teacher "CNAs are the base of all that happens - RN/LPNs don't really see the patient - the CNA is the one who interacts with them on a daily basis. the one who sees all that changes in the diet, in their daily functions. they are very important." and I'm sure we are - it's not that i mind working in the background where no one sees me, but i do mind watching people die. it's funny i haven't thought about death so much in my life... but now i find my self asking Bryan questions every night about death and when we get older... it's depressing. it makes me so glad i have something else to look forward to! but some of them don't. and the problem is that unless we are asked we can't tell them about Christ's finished work. so then I'm left with a question - will I even make a difference?